Act IV
Scene I
A church.
Enter Don Pedro, Don John, Leonato, Friar Francis, Claudio, Benedick, Hero, Beatrice, and attendants. | |
Leonato | Come, Friar Francis, be brief; only to the plain form of marriage, and you shall recount their particular duties afterwards. |
Friar | You come hither, my lord, to marry this lady? |
Claudio | No. |
Leonato | To be married to her: friar, you come to marry her. |
Friar | Lady, you come hither to be married to this count? |
Hero | I do. |
Friar | If either of you know any inward impediment why you should not be conjoined, I charge you, on your souls, to utter it. |
Claudio | Know you any, Hero? |
Hero | None, my lord. |
Friar | Know you any, count? |
Leonato | I dare make his answer, none. |
Claudio | O, what men dare do! what men may do! what men daily do, not knowing what they do! |
Benedick | How now! interjections? Why, then, some be of laughing, as, ah, ha, he! |
Claudio |
Stand thee by, Friar. Father, by your leave:
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Leonato | As freely, son, as God did give her me. |
Claudio |
And what have I to give you back, whose worth
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Don Pedro | Nothing, unless you render her again. |
Claudio |
Sweet prince, you learn me noble thankfulness.
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Leonato | What do you mean, my lord? |
Claudio |
Not to be married,
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Leonato |
Dear my lord, if you, in your own proof,
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Claudio |
I know what you would say: if I have known her,
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Hero | And seem’d I ever otherwise to you? |
Claudio |
Out on thee! Seeming! I will write against it:
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Hero | Is my lord well, that he doth speak so wide? |
Leonato | Sweet prince, why speak not you? |
Don Pedro |
What should I speak?
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Leonato | Are these things spoken, or do I but dream? |
Don John | Sir, they are spoken, and these things are true. |
Benedick | This looks not like a nuptial. |
Hero | True! O God! |
Claudio |
Leonato, stand I here?
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Leonato | All this is so: but what of this, my lord? |
Claudio |
Let me but move one question to your daughter;
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Leonato | I charge thee do so, as thou art my child. |
Hero |
O, God defend me! how am I beset!
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Claudio | To make you answer truly to your name. |
Hero |
Is it not Hero? Who can blot that name
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Claudio |
Marry, that can Hero;
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Hero | I talk’d with no man at that hour, my lord. |
Don Pedro |
Why, then are you no maiden. Leonato,
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Don John |
Fie, fie! they are not to be named, my lord,
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Claudio |
O Hero, what a Hero hadst thou been,
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Leonato | Hath no man’s dagger here a point for me? Hero swoons. |
Beatrice | Why, how now, cousin! wherefore sink you down? |
Don John |
Come, let us go. These things, come thus to light,
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Benedick | How doth the lady? |
Beatrice | Dead, I think. Help, uncle! Hero! why, Hero! Uncle!—Signior Benedick! Friar! |
Leonato |
O Fate! take not away thy heavy hand.
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Beatrice | How now, cousin Hero! |
Friar | Have comfort, lady. |
Leonato | Dost thou look up? |
Friar | Yea, wherefore should she not? |
Leonato |
Wherefore! Why, doth not every earthly thing
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Benedick |
Sir, sir, be patient.
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Beatrice | O, on my soul, my cousin is belied! |
Benedick | Lady, were you her bedfellow last night? |
Beatrice |
No, truly not; although, until last night,
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Leonato |
Confirm’d, confirm’d! O, that is stronger made
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Friar |
Hear me a little; for I have only been
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Leonato |
Friar, it cannot be.
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Friar | Lady, what man is he you are accused of? |
Hero |
They know that do accuse me; I know none:
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Friar | There is some strange misprision in the princes. |
Benedick |
Two of them have the very bent of honour;
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Leonato |
I know not. If they speak but truth of her,
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Friar |
Pause awhile,
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Leonato | What shall become of this? what will this do? |
Friar |
Marry, this well carried shall on her behalf
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Benedick |
Signior Leonato, let the friar advise you:
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Leonato |
Being that I flow in grief,
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Friar |
’Tis well consented: presently away;
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Benedick | Lady Beatrice, have you wept all this while? |
Beatrice | Yea, and I will weep a while longer. |
Benedick | I will not desire that. |
Beatrice | You have no reason; I do it freely. |
Benedick | Surely I do believe your fair cousin is wronged. |
Beatrice | Ah, how much might the man deserve of me that would right her! |
Benedick | Is there anyway to show such friendship? |
Beatrice | A very even way, but no such friend. |
Benedick | May a man do it? |
Beatrice | It is a man’s office, but not yours. |
Benedick | I do love nothing in the world so well as you: is not that strange? |
Beatrice | As strange as the thing I know not. It were as possible for me to say I loved nothing so well as you: but believe me not; and yet I lie not; I confess nothing, nor I deny nothing. I am sorry for my cousin. |
Benedick | By my sword, Beatrice, thou lovest me. |
Beatrice | Do not swear, and eat it. |
Benedick | I will swear by it that you love me; and I will make him eat it that says I love not you. |
Beatrice | Will you not eat your word? |
Benedick | With no sauce that can be devised to it. I protest I love thee. |
Beatrice | Why, then, God forgive me! |
Benedick | What offence, sweet Beatrice? |
Beatrice | You have stayed me in a happy hour: I was about to protest I loved you. |
Benedick | And do it with all thy heart. |
Beatrice | I love you with so much of my heart that none is left to protest. |
Benedick | Come, bid me do anything for thee. |
Beatrice | Kill Claudio. |
Benedick | Ha! not for the wide world. |
Beatrice | You kill me to deny it. Farewell. |
Benedick | Tarry, sweet Beatrice. |
Beatrice | I am gone, though I am here: there is no love in you: nay, I pray you, let me go. |
Benedick | Beatrice— |
Beatrice | In faith, I will go. |
Benedick | We’ll be friends first. |
Beatrice | You dare easier be friends with me than fight with mine enemy. |
Benedick | Is Claudio thine enemy? |
Beatrice | Is he not approved in the height a villain, that hath slandered, scorned, dishonoured my kinswoman? O that I were a man! What, bear her in hand until they come to take hands; and then, with public accusation, uncovered slander, unmitigated rancour—O God, that I were a man! I would eat his heart in the marketplace. |
Benedick | Hear me, Beatrice— |
Beatrice | Talk with a man out at a window! A proper saying! |
Benedick | Nay, but, Beatrice— |
Beatrice | Sweet Hero! She is wronged, she is slandered, she is undone. |
Benedick | Beat— |
Beatrice | Princes and counties! Surely, a princely testimony, a goodly count, Count Comfect; a sweet gallant, surely! O that I were a man for his sake! or that I had any friend would be a man for my sake! But manhood is melted into curtesies, valour into compliment, and men are only turned into tongue, and trim ones too: he is now as valiant as Hercules that only tells a lie and swears it. I cannot be a man with wishing, therefore I will die a woman with grieving. |
Benedick | Tarry, good Beatrice. By this hand, I love thee. |
Beatrice | Use it for my love some other way than swearing by it. |
Benedick | Think you in your soul the Count Claudio hath wronged Hero? |
Beatrice | Yea, as sure is I have a thought or a soul. |
Benedick | Enough, I am engaged; I will challenge him. I will kiss your hand, and so I leave you. By this hand, Claudio shall render me a dear account. As you hear of me, so think of me. Go, comfort your cousin: I must say she is dead: and so, farewell. Exeunt. |
Scene II
A prison.
Enter Dogberry, Verges, and Sexton, in gowns; and the Watch, with Conrade and Borachio. | |
Dogberry | Is our whole dissembly appeared? |
Verges | O, a stool and a cushion for the sexton. |
Sexton | Which be the malefactors? |
Dogberry | Marry, that am I and my partner. |
Verges | Nay, that’s certain; we have the exhibition to examine. |
Sexton | But which are the offenders that are to be examined? let them come before master constable. |
Dogberry | Yea, marry, let them come before me. What is your name, friend? |
Borachio | Borachio. |
Dogberry | Pray, write down, Borachio. Yours, sirrah? |
Conrade | I am a gentleman, sir, and my name is Conrade. |
Dogberry | Write down, master gentleman Conrade. Masters, do you serve God? |
Conrade, Borachio | Yea, sir, we hope. |
Dogberry | Write down, that they hope they serve God: and write God first; for God defend but God should go before such villains! Masters, it is proved already that you are little better than false knaves; and it will go near to be thought so shortly. How answer you for yourselves? |
Conrade | Marry, sir, we say we are none. |
Dogberry | A marvellous witty fellow, I assure you; but I will go about with him. Come you hither, sirrah; a word in your ear: sir, I say to you, it is thought you are false knaves. |
Borachio | Sir, I say to you we are none. |
Dogberry | Well, stand aside. ’Fore God, they are both in a tale. Have you writ down, that they are none? |
Sexton | Master constable, you go not the way to examine: you must call forth the watch that are their accusers. |
Dogberry | Yea, marry, that’s the eftest way. Let the watch come forth. Masters, I charge you, in the prince’s name, accuse these men. |
First Watch | This man said, sir, that Don John, the prince’s brother, was a villain. |
Dogberry | Write down Prince John a villain. Why, this is flat perjury, to call a prince’s brother villain. |
Borachio | Master constable— |
Dogberry | Pray thee, fellow, peace: I do not like thy look, I promise thee. |
Sexton | What heard you him say else? |
Second Watch | Marry, that he had received a thousand ducats of Don John for accusing the Lady Hero wrongfully. |
Dogberry | Flat burglary as ever was committed. |
Verges | Yea, by mass, that it is. |
Sexton | What else, fellow? |
First Watch | And that Count Claudio did mean, upon his words, to disgrace Hero before the whole assembly, and not marry her. |
Dogberry | O villain! thou wilt be condemned into everlasting redemption for this. |
Sexton | What else? |
Second Watch | This is all. |
Sexton | And this is more, masters, than you can deny. Prince John is this morning secretly stolen away; Hero was in this manner accused, in this manner refused, and upon the grief of this suddenly died. Master constable, let these men be bound, and brought to Leonato’s: I will go before and show him their examination. Exit. |
Dogberry | Come, let them be opinioned. |
Verges | Let them be in the hands— |
Conrade | Off, coxcomb! |
Dogberry | God’s my life, where’s the sexton? let him write down the prince’s officer coxcomb. Come, bind them. Thou naughty varlet! |
Conrade | Away! you are an ass, you are an ass. |
Dogberry | Dost thou not suspect my place? dost thou not suspect my years? O that he were here to write me down an ass! But, masters, remember that I am an ass; though it be not written down, yet forget not that I am an ass. No, thou villain, thou art full of piety, as shall be proved upon thee by good witness. I am a wise fellow, and, which is more, an officer, and, which is more, a householder, and, which is more, as pretty a piece of flesh as any in Messina, and one that knows the law, go to; and a rich fellow enough, go to; and a fellow that hath had losses, and one that hath two gowns and everything handsome about him. Bring him away. O that I had been writ down an ass! Exeunt. |